LIBRA FULL MOON or How I Learned to Love Myself More Than I Love Irrational Arson as the Answer
Marfa, TX. 4/19/19
Hello wizard campers and welcome to another exciting edition of the Wizard Report™️. Today we are talking about the Full Moon in Libra and everything that, that entails. This is the second Full Moon in this sign; the first one was back on the Equinox and occurred at 0* and since then the days have gotten longer, spring has started to get sprung and we have all had the opportunity to examine our relationship to balance, beauty and yes, relationships. Which brings us to this Full Moon at the spooky old 29th degree of Libra. The last degree of a sign can be a turning point where we are able to really learn and integrate the lessons that a sign has to offer us before moving off into the uncharted territory of whatever comes next.
Here we have the Moon, or, our emotional self, being all activated at this 29th degree in the sign of relationships. Eeeewwww. From the Equinox till now we have gone all the way through this process of learning how to be in balance and come to terms with our evolving understanding of relationship. Now we find ourselves standing on the edge, needing to really feel into and accept what we have learned over this past lunar cycle so that we can move forward.
Meanwhile, like any Full Moon, the Moon is being opposed by the Sun who is posted up in the last degree of Aries and conjunct to Uranus in Taurus. Watch out now because this is a pretty fiery combination who might not have the patience for the information that the Moon is illuminating.
The moon be like “oh snap I just noticed all these ways that I’m perpetuating unhealthy relationships patterns where I am out of balance with myself to gain acceptance from others.” And the Sun is like: “I don’t need anyone, I’m just going to take all my shit out the house while my partner is at work. I’m not even gunna leave a note.” Simultaneously Uranus is drenching the drapes in gasoline and laughing maniacally as he plugs way too many appliances into to that busted outlet in the kitchen.
Quincunx to all this, Venus is in a lose conjunction to Mercury and Chiron, so all of this core wound stuff is coming up, but we don’t even see it. Instead of being like: “Let me examine how my needs have not been met in relationships, both intimate and platonic, because of cycles that I have continued to subconsciously play out due to core wounds resulting in a negative self-image and patterns of unhealthy attachment. I should probably talk to my partner about this new understanding so we can work through this and form a stronger and more stable bond.” I’m like: “Fuck this scrub, it’s all their fault and ima turn this condo in to motherfuckin Notre-Dame before I peace out into the sunset”
But before we go there Quasimodo, let’s just take a step back from the ledge, put away the matches and take a couple of deep breaths. “Wooosahhh.” Alright, before we make any drastic relationship or interior decorating choices let’s take a look at the Tarot for some guidance on how to proceed into the light of this moon.
First card that comes up is THE 2 OF COINS: These two coins are wicked reminiscent of the two luminaries, the Sun opposing the Moon and us in the middle trying to manage all the emotions and desires that are coming up . This card shows us balancing our relationship with ourself and our relationship with the other. This is literally a balancing act, which is what Libra is all about, but here it looks more like we are juggling. What’s up with that? It’s because it’s a constant choice of action, like a dance, like a two step, like the Lambada, the forbidden dance. Weather we like it or not we are social creatures who’s core desire is to connect with each other. Even from across the room we are held by others and are affected by their movements. It is our responsibility to have awareness around why we act and react the way we do so that we are not just perpetuating old patterns that we have been playing out for years, life times, generations. Here we need to come into balance with ourselves, our emotions and our needs while at the same time recognizing the other, what they are asking of us and how they are showing up. Here we learn to hold both things, ourselves and someone else. This is a departure point where everything can change or everything can stay the same.
Next card - THE 9 OF WANDS: Have you had it up to here with your feelings? Are you Feeling in conflict with others? Perhaps you are just feeling conflicted. Before you wall yourself up or start blaming others check in with yourself and see what your needs really are. It is alright to feel conflicted, and to not know what you want, but be careful not to project blame because you are feeling feelings and it’s weird. Try and stay with it, breathe into it and see what comes up. Don’t just wall out the world because you are afraid of being vulnerable. With the sun in Arise conjunct Uranus it’s easy to just be like “Fuck it, I’m no dealing with this” and just flip the table and walk away but maybe sleep on it for a night or two. This card represents the place where the wound comes to the surface, where Venus meets Chiron and the blindfold gets pulled back to reveal that initial pain that both illuminates and shapes our behaviors. Here we have this amazing opportunity to look at our shit and begin to heal. You might want to ask yourself, while leaning on your last leaning wand “what is the lesson here?” Before pulling your blindfold back down and waving that wand wildly like my drunk uncle attacking a piñata at a 6 year olds birthday. (A sight to behold btw)
And in conclusion we arrive at THE QUEEN OF COINS: Here through the recognition of our self in relationship to the other, and the difficulties that have shaped our patterns around relationships, we have the opportunity to find love, stability, and security by first recognizing our own self worth and then asking others to meet us there. That’s a tall order I know but The Queen of Coins is a baller who is grounded in the body and rooted in abundance. She is the image of the stable base that we try and create for ourselves where we feel secure, valued, seen and respected. The Queen cares for us while we learn to love ourselves. She teaches us principles of self parenting, compassion and self love. She plants her bare foot in the earth and exclaims: “My only possessions are the quality of my actions and everything beyond that is not under my control.” After the tumult of the 9 of Wands she holds the mirror for us and tells us that it’s alright, that we’ve come through it, and we are deserving of love in ways that are safe and reciprocal. She holds you close and asks what your self love practices look like? And how can you best give yourself the support that you need at this time? Can you look in the mirror and be like “I love myself and I have a right to be here, I have a right to be in this body, I have a right to be in this place, I have a right to be on this earth, living this life, and I have a right to be in connection with people who can respect me and support me as I respect and support others. I am a Queen god dammit and I have a right to exist.
And with that good people I will leave you to contemplate our connection to ourselves, each other and the cosmos by the light of this Libra full moon. And I’ll be back in the not so distant future with another exciting edition of Camp Wizard Camp!